When you are on a mission to build a beautiful life connection is an incredibly important factor to consider. Not just for business success, but for personal growth and fulfilment in life. 

This has been one of the biggest lessons on my own journey. 

I’m such an extrovert and I love being around people.

For me personally, that’s where I grow the most. Don’t get me wrong, I love journaling. I love doing my own personal development routines. But the reality is where I’ve had the most growth, whether it be around my money mindset, whether it be with my business, has been in group environments.

I have the biggest breakthroughs in a group environment where I’m being supported in conversation with other people. 

And that is why this episode was devoted to relationships [00:09:00] and connection!

If you did like this episode be sure to screenshot and share on Instagram and of course tag me + Alexandra, @erinmayhenry, and @tidesandloli.

What is actually in my control?

This is my favourite question to ask. “The what” automatically puts you into action. [00:14:30] Instead of focusing on what isn’t going right, ask yourself “what can I do about this?” 

This is the biggest block for so many people in business, you know, they come up with excuses, they have all the mindset work that they need to do, but maybe they’re just not prioritizing doing it. 

If you are the thing that’s getting in the way of your business, you need to start by asking yourself: What’s inside of my control and what’s outside of my control and what can I do with both of these scenarios?

The pandemic was completely outside of our control, but for the most part, our excuses, our routines, our rituals, and self-love is within our control. 

“When I reflect back to when I was in the beginning stages of my business and I, a thousand percent was making so many excuses. I was avoiding the mindset work and I was really kind of looking for the externals to say, okay, this  is what I have to do next. This is what I need to do. And just like you said, it really starts internally with connection with yourself.”

It’s not easy. It really isn’t easy and you’re gonna wanna run away from it. 

It often is really hard sometimes in your own environment when you’re making these shifts where maybe the doubts, the fears, the judgment, the comparison shows up. Finding a community that fosters those relationships and that connection to yourself first is so important. 

How does someone get started on that self-healing journey? 

Make 2 lists:

1. What lights your soul on fire. What makes you so happy? Name 1 to 10 things. 

2. What are the things that set you into more of those negative emotions and feelings? What are those triggers? 

Start with these two things to build your awareness. It’s from that awareness that change will happen.

Learning about yourself is the most important work you can do.

The reality is that when we flock to social media or conversations with friends before actually searching for the answer within ourselves – that’s when we are being influenced by the people around us.

Personal responsibility is such a tough one because it can be very deeply rooted. And I think their other pitfall too, for women specifically is we almost take too much responsibility when it’s not time for us to take responsibility. 

As women, one of our biggest strengths is that we are so incredibly nurturing and we cultivate community naturally because [00:39:30] that’s what our role really is. As a woman, your body is made to create life, to develop it. So as women, [00:40:00] one of our key strengths is to nurture.

Every strength has a different side of a coin. And that coin is that we tend to forget about ourselves. We don’t prioritize ourselves. We allow. We go into people-pleasing.

There is no such thing as balance.

You are always gonna be on a Teeter [00:41:30] totter trying to figure out the balance. Your goal should be figuring out how to constantly adjust as you’re going through life.

You have a choice to shift at any moment. The moment you realize that you are [00:44:30] in control of it, then you can change your life.

And I understand we all have responsibilities. We all have things that are happening in our lives that are maybe outside of our control and are difficult. But you have the ability to shift within your day to do things that really light your soul on fire. 

How do we start to cultivate these conversations? 

There are always communities available for you. You can even find them here within the Simply Business Academy or the Chillpreneur Co. No matter where you find it, here are the 2 keys to true connection:

1. Authentic Care: Actually care about the other person. 

2. Intentional listening: Don’t make responses or replies in your head while the person’s talking. Actually listen to the words they’re saying and absorb them. Take a pause and then go into a response. 

It really starts with the courage and the strength and belief that the answers lays in the connection to yourself.

Be sure to connect with Alexandra here:

https://www.instagram.com/tidesandloli/

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