How to FINALLY start Enjoying your Life (be happy)

I’ve done a lot of work to upgrade myself, upgrade my confidence, upgrade my life, upgrade my business. But none of this is as important as learning how to just enjoy life.

I’ve seen so many people get absolutely everything they ever dreamed of, the body of their dreams, the business of their dreams, the relationship of their dreams, but at the end of the day, they’re still unhappy. Why?

Because they just don’t know how to enjoy life, they simply just don’t have the right energy, the right perspective.

Outward success, although these things are amazing, and if you do them in the right way can bring you a lot of pride and joy, if you don’t work on the inner stuff, on the inner sense of fulfilment and enjoyment, none of that is going to matter.

While this topic could be a little more theoretical in nature, I wanted to give you an actual formula, a four-step process that you can use to enjoy your life more.


So get ready to take notes! Because, as I said, this is an actual formula that you can use in your life to ensure that whilst you’re going off and trying to achieve all of these incredible successes, you’re also working on internal fulfilment.



The first step is all about perspective. This, honestly, is one of the most important words in our language today because perspective truly can change your life.

I watched a documentary a couple of years ago on the happiest people in the world. And the happiest people in the world are some of the poorest people in the world. There were third world countries where the quality of happiness was so much greater than places like the US, the UK or Australia, where the economy is booming.

I think that so many people think all of these outward things will bring them happiness, but we just simply have the wrong perspective on what is truly important. Now, everybody’s perspective’s different. I’m not one to sit here and say that if you’re someone who thrives off of luxury travel and designing bags, that your perspective is wrong, and that’s not what makes you happy. If that’s truly what makes you happy, go for it.

But having perspective is so so incredibly important. Knowing that nothing is the end of the world until the end of the world. Understanding when you fall into victim mode. Knowing how to make yourself truly happy. Knowing what your values are and living in alignment with that. Those are the kinds of things that will change the actual quality of your life.

And again, it’s all a matter of perspective. On the side of that, I think so many people can achieve true happiness on the way to success because they train themselves to be unfulfilled and unsatisfied. The goalpost is always moving forward. You know, you might be trying to achieve a particular financial goal in your life or in your business right now. What’s most likely going to happen is that when you get to that financial goal, the goalpost will have moved forward, you will have made adjustments in your life, meaning that you want more and more and more. That’s just kind of the nature of human beings.

So having perspective about your life as it is right now is one of the most important things that will allow you to feel happy and fulfilled and enjoy your life, not just now, but when you actually achieve the successes, you’re going after.

And here’s a few things that you can do:

1.     Allow yourself to get excited.

I don’t know where along the lines, it became lame to be excited about things. But when you flip your perspective on what’s truly important in life, what you do is allow yourself to get excited about things and anticipate things to enjoy things when they actually happen. The big and small things in life. Allowing yourself to get excited about all of the stuff that is happening in your life is one thing that, with the right perspective, will help you enjoy it more.

2.     Learn how to be grateful.

Gratitude is perspectives best friend. It’s so easy to get caught up in our own dramas and catastrophize what’s going on in our lives. And I’m not saying that when you are experiencing something emotional, you shouldn’t feel those emotions because somebody else has it worse. I don’t believe in that kind of toxic positivity stuff. You need a feel to heal. You need to experience your life as it is, and everybody is entitled to shit experiences and negative emotions. However, what a lot of people don’t do is realize when the good is good. Sometimes, we fully understand when the bad is bad, but we don’t really sit in when the good is good. So learn gratitude, feel gratitude for the things that you’ve been able to achieve so far, what you have. If you can really feel grateful for every step along the journey, satisfaction will never leave your side. And when we talked before about that ever-moving goalposts, most people are just waiting for the goalpost to be happy. But when you truly change your perspective and sit into gratitude, you’re happy every step along the way. You’re winning every single day. Every step you take is a goal. And so make sure you learn gratitude for every step you take along that journey, rather than just waiting for the milestone to happen.


 So there’s three C’s that I’ve come up with that really truly contribute to your ability to enjoy your life.

1. Clarity is so incredibly important.

Knowing who you are, what you want, and what will make you happy and following that is one of the most important things that you can do to enjoy your life more. There is nothing more satisfying than the feeling of self-pride, self-love, self-fulfilment, all of these things.

When you’re on the path of alignment with what you truly want out of life rather than what everybody else wants for you or what you think you want. That is one of the biggest keys to self-satisfaction. So take the time to truly figure out what it is that you want, what you truly desire with your life, what makes you happy, what you value, what lights you up.

So many people are living out of alignment with their values with what’s important to them. They’re doing what they think they should be doing or what society is ingrained to do rather than just doing what feels good.

2.  Challenge.

I know most people don’t feel satisfied in life, whether they’re achieving goals or not, because they feel stuck in complacency, in apathy. Most people just feel like they’re in this ever-evolving merry go round of life, never really moving forward. And the reason for this is simply they’re just not challenging themselves. This may sound like cliche advice, but true happiness and fulfilment is always found outside of your comfort zone. You have to show up for yourself and challenge yourself each and every day to feel that sense of self-satisfaction and enjoyment. It doesn’t matter if you start the business of your dreams. There’s going to come to a point in time where it gets boring. It gets repetitive. And so, to stay satisfied and stay happy and continually enjoy your life, you need to be consistently challenging yourself to move forward.

If you’ve ever heard of the flow state, the flow state is one of the best ways to induce satisfaction, pride and fulfilment, getting yourself into a flow state that state where you know, time disappears, and you’re just so engrossed in a task. That has been scientifically studied to induce a sense of fulfilment. When humans get into a flow state regularly, they are more satisfied and happy with their lives.

 You need to be challenged, you need to be challenged so that you’re active and engaged in the task, but it doesn’t need to be too challenging to feel overwhelmed and sabotage. There’s this beautiful equilibrium of challenge that you need to show up for each and every day. And the simplest way to do this is just always trying new things.

 The more we challenge ourselves, the more proud we’re going to be. And the more proud we are, the happier and fulfilled we will actually feel.

3.  Contentment.

This may actually feel like it contradicts the challenge side of things, but you also have to be content. So many of us are unfulfilled and unhappy because we’re constantly in a state of self-judgment. You have to be content with how every moment in your life pans out. Sometimes you might challenge yourself, and you might fail. Sometimes you might try to get clarity, and you feel overwhelmed and confused. But if you can always bring it back to me, I’m doing the very best that I can and drop the sense of self-judgment, leading to more happiness, satisfaction, and fulfilment.

I think guilt is just such a negative emotion that so many of us unnecessarily experience. I mean, if you do something wrong, someone should feel guilty about it because it’s going to make you not do it again. But so many of us unnecessarily feel guilty. We feel guilty for achieving success. We feel guilty for living a good life. We feel guilty for being happy.

We need to flip that to a certain level of contentment. We need to be content with how our lives are who we are, how we’re growing, how we’re evolving, what is happening in each and every moment because it is what it is.

 If you do something and it doesn’t work out, it’s okay. It is what it is. Just keep moving forward. Be content with everything that happens in your life. Of course, learn and grow from your mistakes. If you do something wrong, absolutely apologize and learn and grow for that. But don’t beat yourself up. Be content with what happened because that moment that that thing happened in is already gone. And if you spend too much time thinking about it, you will never be able to move forward happy and fulfilled.

Let’s just revisit the formula that I have for you for enjoying your life more:

Make sure you work on your perspective. It’s all about getting excited and loving life and feeling grateful for things slipping yourself to a more optimistic positive perspective. A growth mindset, if you will, will help you so much. Then focus on the three C’s: get clarity on what you want and get in alignment with those things, make sure you’re challenging yourself every single day, and be content with how your life pans out because you cannot change the past or you can do is learn and change the future.

If you haven’t already, be sure to join us in the Game Changer community on Facebook or on Instagram – @erinmayhenry.

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